“The one thing this man has going for him, was the
common people in large numbers flocked to hear him speak, and tell them of the
great things he aspired to do for them. Donald Trump fits this description. The
last time I heard a story like this, the man’s name was Jesus Christ… in the
political arena, among the common people and the establishment, he is just like
him.” - D. Ortiz, Trump Supporter
As is the
case with 93 percent of the deceitful declarations by the pro-tem presidential
candidate, himself - pro-tem because come July 22nd, the day after
the conclusion of the Republican Convention, D.J. Trump will be dust in the
wind, extremely loud and annoying dust in the wind, but all he’ll be is dust in
the wind, nevertheless, and whomever the sacrificial lamb appointed to replace
him as the GOP nominee is, he or she (who are we kidding, it will be the usual white
guy) can begin preparing a concession speech to be delivered in November to
President Clinton II – the list to follow involved no research, very likely
contains not a single grain of fact, mostly fancy, and is guaranteed to offend
a sizeable segment of U.S. citizenry.
So, attempt
to contain your umbrage and outrage, exceedingly sensitive Donald devotees, for
this is just a bit of comedy fluff – a highly disparaging bit of comedy fluff
for certain, but if you wish to sic that malicious, egomaniacal, mangy mongrel;
that hateful, bigoted, misogynistic, ignorant, dangerous sociopath, on our
great country and indeed on the entire planet, you truly do deserve far, far
worse than a soupcon of satirical jabbing – loss of the right to vote, revoked citizenship,
an hour at a kissing booth with Sarah Palin, a good old-fashioned tar and
feathering, a dunk tank full of piranhas, are mayhaps all good possibilities
worthy of consideration. When your insolent idol ignites enmity and malevolence
toward women, immigrants, minorities, veterans, P.O.W.s and the disabled, and you
chuckle and cheer in abominable
accord, surely you can stomach a gentle jest or two.
I do doubt
the presence of Trumpeters perusing these often prescient pages, however, the
proliferation of polysyllabic words alone would pose quite the stumbling block.
But, while Trump is the biggest insult to the electoral process in the history
of these United States, and presents a dangerous dilemma of pacaderm-like proportions,
it is these supporters who have gleefully, hatefully and stupidly carried him
to this prominent place of potential power, and present the more pressing
problem. He will be gone, but they will remain. He is but one Mephistopheles, they are many millions.
And so, with
gratitude and apologies to David Letterman -
Top Ten
Irrefutable Facts about a Donald Trump Supporter
10. You’re
upset about the Bill Cosby case because you always considered him “one of the good
ones.”
9. The
Orlando mass shooting has left you confused as you revile Muslims and
homosexuals equally.
8. You don’t
even speak a “first language.”
7. When you
say “the good old days” you mean the 1850’s.
6. You misread
his slogan as “Make America Hate Again.”
5. A cat is
both your pet and the word that knocked you out of the spelling bee.
4. According
to P.T. Barnum, one of you is born every minute.
3. You’re the reason manufacturers feel the need to put directions
on shampoo bottles, and in one word sentences - Lather. Rinse. Repeat.
2. You believe Adolph Hitler was just
misunderstood.
1. The letters PhD will never, ever, ever follow your name on
any document.
“HELL YES...TRUMP 2016,,,HE WILL THROW OBUMMER,CLINTON
KERRY,REID,AND LYNCH ON DEATH ROW FOR TREASON...AND DEPORT ALL MUZZIES..” - C.C. Jones, Trump Supporter
Any comments, questions, criticisms, candid
confessions, cash contributions? Contact
me at butchersaprons@mail.com.
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