Tuesday, December 24, 2013

Sessions with Santa - Christmas Captions

“If there was a way
I'd hold back this tear
But it's Christmas day
Baby, please come home” – Barry, Greenwich, Spector

“Christmas, Christmas time is near
Time for toys and time for cheer
We've been good but we can't last
Hurry Christmas, hurry fast” – a chipmunk

That silent night is very noisily approaching - not much is calm and not too many are bright (and just try rounding yon a virgin.) The very fabric of our nation is being torn asunder in a bitter debate over the ignorant and hateful words of an irrelevant, hillbilly, reality-star duck hunter. Meaningless sensation rules the day as calm, rationality and intelligence have bid a bitter and bilious adieu to the daily discourse. The President battles a pre-Civil War mentality from half of (the birth of) a nation, and the obstructionist Congress continues upon its feckless, infantile, mean-spirited way. Sleep in Heavenly peace. 

Clearly, what we require as we finish up our final, festive preparations for the yearly, benevolent, birthday bacchanalia for the Prince of Peace (awkward segue ahead) is some seasonal, jolly, good-natured holiday humor; the variety of jests and jabs that would please Andy Williams and Perry Como as appropriate Yuletide yuks. For while it may appear that the proper spirit of the season often seems solely to exist in the Miracles of 34th Streets and with the angels who get their wings, wherever a blogger takes cheap, easy satiric shots at shots of celebrities and Santa Claus, Christmas still lives in the hearts and dreams of those, young and old, and lo the many Whos down in Whoville.

No contemporary Christmas would be complete without the finest Rock-era holiday hit, and performance.  Darlene Love’s annual appearances with David Letterman have become one of television’s superlative season’s greetings – Christmas (Baby Please Come Home.)

Any comments, questions, criticisms, candid confessions, cash contributions? Contact me at butchersaprons@mail.com.

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