Saturday, March 23, 2013

Grandeur – The Curse of Corporate Culture

“Cause he gets up in the morning,
And he goes to work at nine,
And he comes back home at five-thirty,
Gets the same train every time.
Cause his world is built round punctuality,
It never fails.” - Ray Davies

My friends, I feel quite confident in the assertion that one thought that never crossed your craniums while perusing previous postings was, “this blog’s okay, but what it’s really missing is pretention and haughtiness.”  After all, as author I’ve taken a pseudonym from the preeminent metropolis on the globe, exhibited a writing style solely possible if one has recently swallowed a thesaurus, and like the great Professor Irwin Corey before me, state opinions as if Moses descending from Mount Sinai in possession of mankind’s greatest truths, and as a renowned authority on all things, animal, vegetable and mineral.  Well, pish-posh, or you ain’t seen nothing yet (depending on whether you feel more at peace with a Mary Poppins or Al Jolson reference)  for today we dip our toe into the shallow waters of poetry. And unlike last week’s presentation of the classic, “Richard Cory” by Edwin Arlington Robinson, this minor rhyme is self-penned, with the hope being that if you are now or have ever been gainfully employed and have experienced the necessity of reportage to another, you will associate with this vituperative verse of vengeance. Should this unfamiliar foray into the finer arts not suit your taste or temperament, please practice patience as we will conclude with comical birthday wishes and a Kink’s standard.


Tonight we pity the King and Queen
Who rule from 9 to 5.
When dusk embarks,
And power wanes,
Just ego’s left alive.
A corporate clone
With little worth,
No power but to bully.
A tangled self
Awash in fear
A life, unrealized fully.
Are you content with cubicles as eminent domain?
Or is there more that you once sought
A love as life’s refrain?
You made your choice
As all must do
We look back on decisions
Then realize
We’re just despised,
The subject of derision.
Before we reach our final choice
Time gives us many ways
To modify a tone of voice
And soften future days.
Your training’s full of falsehoods,
Experience, but lies
Have you no vision of yourself
In other people’s eyes?
A second, third and final chance
Afforded to us all.
Take Providence, your private God,
And change before your fall.

Saturday, March 23rd Birthdays

Happy 23rd birthday to Princess Eugenie of York, daughter of Prince Andrew and Sarah Ferguson.  As the sixth in succession to the British Crown, we extend natal wishes with the good and equitable feelings and knowledge that she is just as unlikely to ascend to the royal throne as any of us commoners. However, should she read this; she does possess the power to off nycityman’s head.

It’s also the birthday of another daughter of royalty, this time of the theatrical sort, as Amanda Plummer, child of Christopher Plummer and Tammy Grimes turns 56. When we were both much younger folk, we actually spent a day working together on an unsold TV pilot. When asked of her memories of nycityman a look of confusion, fear and disdain is her most common response.

Also reaching her 56th year today is Teresa Ganzel, and as confusion, fear and disdain now overtake your facial features as well, an explanation - Teresa was the actress to assume the role of Tea Time Movie Matinee Lady in the Johnny Carson, Art Fern sketches upon the passing of Carol Wayne. “You take the San Diego Freeway to the Ventura Freeway. You drive to the Slauson Cutoff, get out of your car, cut off your Slauson.” Anybody? Bueller?

Many happy returns to the talented Chaka Khan, who for years prior to Whitney Houston was "every woman." Quick, name another member of Rufus.

And last, but in no way least, “Hello Dere” and the happiest 91st birthday to comedian Marty Allen, the non-crooning half of comedy duo, Allen and Rossi. At a time when every comic doing the Carson, Douglas, Griffin, Sullivan variety/ talk-show circuit was required, by law, to have the last name Allen (see Marty, Woody, Steve, Dennis, Bernie) the wild antics of Marty and Steve Rossi helped shape a very young nycityboy’s obsession with obscure and forgotten comedy teams.

In conclusion, first a clip of Allen and Rossi at work, and the promised Kink’s gem, “A Well Respected Man.”

Have any comments, questions, criticisms, compliments, candid confessions, cash contributions? Contact me at butchersaprons@mail.com. 

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