A COUPLE OF GUYS SITTING AROUND AT A BUS STOP TALKING ABOUT ELECTION DAY – A “Death of a Salesman” for the New Millennium!

“All the world’s a stage,
And all the men and women merely players;
They have their exits and their entrances,
And one man in his time plays many parts…”  - William “Billy” Shakespeare

Here at “… and several butcher’s aprons” while constantly expressing and promoting liberal and progressive social and political ideology, the intent is always to manifest these sentiments in ways that are, hopefully, more satirical and entertaining, and less proselytizing. Toward that aim, while the usual format is comic commentary, I’ve also attempted poetry, song parody and captioned photos. So, continuing in that 75 year tradition of creative flexibility - proudly presenting the premiere of the world’s most diminutive one act play - but first, some shameless self-promotion. Broadway producers, you know how to contact me.

And now, from the celebrated and acclaimed author of 212 prior “… and several butcher’s aprons” posts, and a number of incendiary but astute anti-Trump tweets; the reader of “Catch-22” and “The Catcher in the Rye” (all my favorite novels have a form of the word “catch” in the title); and the skimmer of “A Clockwork Orange” (it's confusing!) and several chapters of “The New Testament” (even more so!) comes the riveting new play that critics have hailed as “Brief!” “Neatly typed!” “Not particularly well-written and somewhat nonsensical!” and “Shorter than the title!” Winner of the 2017 “Completely Fabricated Award for Best New Drama,” - sit back, experience, engulf yourself in, weep and chortle to – “A Couple of Guys Sitting Around at a Bus Stop Talking about Election Day.”

A COUPLE OF GUYS SITTING AROUND AT A BUS STOP TALKING ABOUT ELECTION DAY – A Dramatic Dialogue in One Scene

EXT: SUBURBAN BUS STOP, ANYWHERE U.S.A.  – 8:32 AM, NOVEMBER 8, 2016

GUS

So, who you voting for?

EARL

I don’t know. I don’t really know much about politics. Or history… or government… or the constipation.

GUS

Constitution?

(EARL nods in assent)

Republican?

EARL

Yeah.

(awkward lengthy pause)

Who’s running?

GUS

Well, the Democrat is the most experienced and qualified person to ever run.

EARL

Sounds shady.

GUS

The Republican has no experience at all... he's a bigot, a thief, talks openly about wanting to nail his own daughter, has been served with about 3500 lawsuits, will take health insurance away from millions of Americans, wants to stop immigration, religious freedom and freedom of speech …

EARL

Go on…

GUS

… lies like a freakin’ Persian rug, and displays all the behaviors of a severe sociopath.

EARL

Hmm. Does either have a penis?

GUS

No. But Trump does self-identify as a man.

EARL

Make America Great Again!!

FIN

To bookend with the opening quote from the Bard, a treat from the 1999 Broadway revival of “Kiss Me Kate,” a production I had the pleasure of enjoying twice – “Brush Up Your Shakespeare.”

“Brush up your Shakespeare
Start quoting him now
Brush up your Shakespeare
And the women you will wow

Just declaim a few lines from 'Othella'
And they think you're a heckuva fella
If your blond won't respond when you flatter 'er
Tell her what Tony told Cleopaterer” – Cole Porter

Any comments, questions, criticisms, candid confessions, cash contributions? Contact me at butchersaprons@mail.com.